we have pet lesbian snakes
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
