I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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