Already got asked if we're dating
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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