super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Randomize
