Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize