: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
