More tranny stories later!
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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