after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
