This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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