dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
