no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I lost the right to judge tonight
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
