well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
