I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i just google imaged poop.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit