When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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