the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize