i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
he was CRYING into my vagina
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Randomize