Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
We talked him into tasing himself.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
