I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
another moral hangover. fuck.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
