covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
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