I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
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