laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
