i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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