Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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