He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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