super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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