I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
