I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
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I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
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The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
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