the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize