at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
