can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Barsexuality is the new black.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize