i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses