We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
