Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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