sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
