I'm really into asian looking animals
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize