A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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