Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
