One girl and one boy is just not enough.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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