Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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