okay pat passed out under dana's car
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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