I wanna passion pit in your ass
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
