people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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