now i know why i became what i already was.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
