I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
