Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
the condom got lost in my hair
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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