Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
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Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
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I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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