I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
