my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
