Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
