Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
