I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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